What I can’t get over in regards to Zarry at the TCAs 2013 is how clear and apparent it was that they were having issues as a result of Perrie’s prescene. There are two people who are used to being together day in and day out and having unlimited access to each other at all times; night and day. But sometimes, Perrie came along.
In those times she visited the tour, those days were no different for Zarry onstage because she remained separated from them in the audience and they remained in their Zarry bubble onstage, for example, she was there during the infamous Sheffield Whispers.
However, for the TCAs, Zarry were intimately linked to Little Mix and therefore Perrie, since Zarry were made to sit with Little Mix while the remainder of the 1D boys left the show after the performance because they were ill.
All throughout the TCAs it is beyond clear that Zayn is conflicted and that he senses Harry is not happy with him. I suspect that by this day Harry was aware that Zayn was going to do the fake engagement for a while. He had written JALBOYH in the days before the TCAs in LA, which demonstrates Harry was broken about realizing he was not Zayn’s one and only and could never be, and was still begging for even a tiny bit of his heart.
Starting on the red carpet, Zayn attempts to hold Harry’s hand, but Harry pulled away. Onstage while accepting their awards, Zayn decides to slap Harry’s bum rather possessively several times. And when they got to their seats and were enduring the awkwardness of being seated together near Perrie, Zayn kept tapping Harry and watching Harry and obsessing over who he was speaking to in the crowd, despite the presence of Perrie Edwards who seemed to bore him.
He got Harry to twerk and tapped him multiple times to make him smile, and finally when he couldn’t take it anymore, he just grabbed Harry and nuzzled him to whisper up close.
I adore adore ADORE this image and this moment SO much, you have no idea. It’s such a meaningful moment caught candidly while the crowd is distracted. The way Zayn is with him. The way Zayn did this in front of HER. That he just needed to be close to him suddenly despite speaking to him over the noise with no problem many other times that day. That he got him to twerk for him in front of her (Harry declined to twerk for the hosts and for the thousands of screaming fans at first. Only Zayn got him to do it.) Then Zayn just grabs him like this…ugh!
Why is this whisper so important? It’s not just the fact that he did it in front of Perrie, it’s because after a long sequence of trying to get Harry’s attention all day, and after speaking to him multiple times in the audience with no issues of Harry hearing him from a distance over the crowd, Zayn suddenly loses it and grabs Harry and nuzzles his face to whisper up close and personal (for no one’s ears but Harry’s.) Their private dynamic and close intimacy was on display for all to see, especially Perrie.