I Won’t Mind

Listen here!

Zayn unfiltered. That is what I have always wanted, and that is what this song provides. No subterfuge. No PR or marketing ploys. Just a conflicted boy singing from his soul in 2014 when he was stuck in the middle of this weird hot/cold and romantic/unromantic dynamic with his bandmate (while secretly contemplating leaving the band.)

This will always be in my top 5 favorite Zayn songs of all time, mainly because it seems so…raw? Everything about the track feels undecorated and unassuming, and that lends to the authenticity generated by some of the most vulnerable lyrics Zayn has ever written. I read about this track somewhere and the writer described it as “elliptical” and a lightbulb went off in my head, because that word is phenomenally fitting.

“I Won’t Mind” is elliptical in the sense that it feels incomplete (both the production and the sentiment being expressed in the lyrics) but it also leaves much to be imagined regarding who and what he is discussing. That is the precise magic of this song. It emerged out of nowhere in 2015 in the wake of Zayn leaving the band, so it was summarily rejected and hated by most Directioners for this reason. They didn’t understand the power this demo held because they were still nursing their wounds from being abandoned by Zayn mid-tour, so they didn’t realize this song in truth had zero to do with Zayn pursuing a solo career.


In my assessment, this track is unspeakably romantic, because it was not recorded with high-level production, nor was it ever marketed, and Zayn himself has never spoken about it. It just feels like this open secret floating around in the ether, which has never been properly addressed by its creator, and in the end all of this adds to its elusive quality. Basically it feels like we the public were allowed to peer in on a private conversation between two unwitting lovers who never anticipated their feelings would see the light of day.

Perhaps more fittingly, it feels like a love letter the world somehow intercepted and published of its own accord, regardless to whether the writer wanted it to be known or not. Or maybe it was fate? Because a love like this simply deserves to be known? Regardless of the reason it was leaked in 2015, we now have it for all of eternity to dissect and speculate on and celebrate, and I selfishly don’t regret that it was leaked.

A part of me even surmises Zayn may have leaked the track himself as a reminder to Harry of his love after he left the band. We all remember how he wore a Green Bay Packers sweater for Harry on March 25th, so the idea that he leaked IWM himself mere days later is not so far-fetched. (Gosh, Imagine Harry’s surprise when immediately after he lost Zayn in 2015, he logs in online to see a private demo that once only belonged to him being passed around the internet; losing it’s original meaning like a game of Chinese Whispers or Telephone, and being reported on by mainstream media. That had to be a mind-blowing day for him.)


For many reasons, I truly truly feel this song was never meant for public consumption. In my heart, I am certain this track was written and recorded for one person’s ears only. (“For your eyes only…”) And we actually have proof that the intended recipient did hear the song in 2014 (when it was written and recorded) long before the public was made aware of it in March 2015.

Let’s take a look back at March 30, 2015, the day it was actually leaked. Zayn had left the band on the 25th, and Naughty Boy (prominent UK producer + Zayn’s BFF at the time) was getting into his first verbal spar with Louis on Twitter, which resulted in him bragging about his working relationship with Zayn, and releasing IWM on Sound Cloud.

Naturally, this fueled a war between “Zaughty” (Zayn + Naughty Boy) and Louis. The mindless foot-soldiers in that war included Zayn’s new solo stans (eyeroll) and the OG Directioners. I say “eyeroll” because honestly phuck his stans (even though I do take Zayn’s side in the 2015 Twitter wars against Louis like I always have.)

In any case, the Sound Cloud link was released, and the fans and media went insane (for varying reasons) but within 24hrs the track was removed. It wasn’t a good look, especially not days after he had left the band under the premise of “wanting to live a normal life.” At this time, Zayn and his team were still operating under the narrative that he did not leave the band to pursue a solo career; although that was demonstrably false.

Zayn had been working with Naughty Boy and MYKL (UK producers) writing and recording music since early 2014, and had already signed to a new record label with a solo record deal by July 2015 (a mere 4 months after he left the band.) So to pretend a solo career wasn’t always in the works since he met these guys in 2014 is just disingenuous.


Here’s the problem with “I Won’t Mind.” It is clearly an earnest and confessional song, speaking to someone who remains a mystery to the world (not to us) about their secret relationship. How can we be so sure?

1.) The song was written and recorded in 2014 WHILE ZAYN WAS ENGAGED TO PERRIE. Zayn met Naughty Boy at the Brit Awards in February 2014 and from then on spent a lot of his free time during breaks in the tour at the studio with him and his crew.

The tweet above is proof the song existed in 2014. We also know that it was written and recorded in 2014 because it was recorded with the batch of songs Zayn created for the FOUR album such as “One Chance To Dance” which were ultimately left off the album. Problem is, Zayn and his team tried to pretend “I Won’t Mind” was also intended for the Four album once he got tons of backlash for recording solo music when the song leaked in March 2015. But it’s clear from the lyrics and based on a tweet from Louis that “I Won’t Mind” was never a rejected 1D demo.

2.) “I Won’t Mind” becomes an even more troubling track when you take a closer look at the lyrics.

In 2014 when this song was written, Zayn was engaged to Perrie. IWM is undeniably a heartfelt tune that meant something to Zayn at the time. It’s all in his voice. That is the most striking aspect of that song, not just the lyrics, not just the lack of production, not just the raw authenticity, but the emotion prevalent in his delivery. So why is Zayn singing in such a heartrending way about someone never being his, when in fact he was engaged to the theoretical love of his life at the time and had been since mid-2013??

That answer is easy. As with all of Zayn’s deeply emotional and ill-timed tracks, it proves they were not written about Perrie. Zayn seems to have had a secondary love that is hinted at strongly in all of his music, such as “Too Much” and “Fingers” and “Common” and “Dusk Till Dawn.”

It’s the reason he writes a song like “Pillowtalk” about extreme sexual chemistry that he can’t live without while Perrie is subsequently writing about how she faked it in bed with him. It’s the same reason he voluntarily dumped Perrie (likely by text) in 2015 the exact same month he signed to a new record label, then got a finish line tattoo after doing so, while also writing “Intermission: Flower” about a love deterred and a love still waiting to blossom so his heart can be at peace. How on earth could either of these songs (written and recorded in 2015) be about the girl he voluntarily and conveniently dumped when he signed to a new record label??? THEY’RE NOT ABOUT HER.

Zerrie were not on the same page in their relationship at any point, because Zayn was always emotionally and physically preoccupied with someone else. That’s why many people call Zerrie and the engagement fake, just like Zigi. Whether all parties involved in Zayn’s two major public relationships realize it or not, their relationship with Zayn was/is PR-driven, lacks integrity, and is apart of a major love triangle in Zayn’s life.

3.) Then you have to consider the fact that in IWM Zayn mentions having someone’s back from the start, and it is similar to the language Harry uses in “Sweet Creature” where he references a coming of age love with someone he “started” out with living in the same house. For me the “start” in both songs references the greatest journey both have taken in their lives, which is music. They both got their start together in music at the same time, growing, learning, traveling the world and falling in love.

Some try to pretend IWM is about Liam and “Sweet Creature” is about Louis because it is evident in those songs that both Zayn and Harry are referencing their time in the band (and therefore a relationship with a bandmate.) But Ziams and Larries fail to realize that all solid, consistent, mutually derived, reliable, irrefutable evidence leads to one conclusion: Zayn and Harry were involved with each other, off and on, rather intensely, and on a romantic level since Day One.

Three of the boys in question have had children with women, so mentioning Zigi having a baby is completely irrelevant here, especially because gay and closeted men have babies ALL THE TIME. What cannot be refuted or ignored or buried are the many ways in which Harry implicated Zayn in his latest musical offering Fine Line (as in every song he has ever written tbh.) Especially mentioning how his lover is afraid to be open, while Zayn is telling us in “Tightrope” how afraid and conflicted he is, and how he was running from his one truth, which Harry faced in “Lights Up.”


PAGE TWO: I Won’t Mind, Someday Maybe, & Tightrope

60 thoughts on “I Won’t Mind

  1. Feel the title of Z’s first album Mind of Mine is from “i won’t Mind … you’ll never be Mine”

  2. I really want to know your thoughts on the fact that Harry is wearing the Peace ring again. We know he only wore it because of Z and now he’s wearing it again.

  3. I won’t mind is one of the saddest songs I’ve ever heard and tells us lots of facts about zayn and Harry’s relationship.I’m not allowed to talk about it but I gotta tell you we are who we are when no one’s watching . Is this due to a clause in their contract ? There is a lot of talk of Sycos contracts at the moment and people discussing them in public have been threatened with lawsuits . Zayns PR seems to consist of Gigi and Zayns assistant sitting in a park with a notepad each .He has done a couple of interviews which is better than all the pap walks.Also I think the Grammy remarks that Zayn said are also due to Dua Lipa as well as Harry getting nominated and winning.She isolated with the Hadids who are very ambitious so it probably made him mad . Both Harry and Dua Lipa are nominated for Brits now .Zayns albums are amazing but He won’t get the recognition He deserves without promoting himself unfortunately.

    1. I don’t know British law, but I don’t think a legal contract or NDA would keep them from talking (I think that makes it more sad, because that means they are keeping themselves from talking). It would be written that they would have to pay back money they were given specifically not to talk and they have big piles of money, so having to pay money back wouldn’t be much of an incentive, they would also have attorneys of their own looking out for their interests. I signed an NDA and I’m not allowed to talk specifics and there were other actions attached to it or I have to pay back money and face possible further action, so the threat of paying money back is motivation for me, but I’m not a millionaire and I had two attorneys explaining everything to me and advising not to sign if I didn’t think I could do the provisions in the NDA. Attorneys wouldn’t let a client sign something that had some kind of a threat in it, like if you don’t do this, we will burn your house down.

      I have heard of entertainment and sports contracts having clauses for if you break the law. One Direction seemed like they were worked to death, I wonder how much of that was written down, it seems like there would be child labor laws to protect them, they sometimes had two shows in one day. So I think they had work you like a dog contracts, with lawyers representing them that they willingly signed and they got paid. The first contract Harry signed with the band would have been signed by his parents because he wasn’t 18 and I just can’t imagine his Mom signing anything that would take away some part of H’s personal freedom forever.

  4. random thought:
    We know that IWM was so honest and raw because at the time it was intended for Harry’s ears only. I wonder if there are more songs that Z sent to H over the years that are like that. 🥺
    Just considering that he seems to be making music all the time.
    Since music is his only real outlet, I wish he would be less filtered when it comes to what he shares with the public. Tightrope received a great response and I think it’s fair to say that even people who don’t really know what it’s about can sense that it carries an importance. If he wants to be more open, this would be the safest place for him to start ❤️

    1. This is a great point and I agree with you. I think Zayn probably sends Harry songs all the time. I have always thought the song he sang to for Harry’s 2018 birthday was a song he had sent to Harry privately as well. When he croons “I see you every night, always on my mind. Always on my mind.”

    2. Yes I think/hope so too! First of all bc that’s damn romantic – I mean I definitely can’t relate lol – and secondly bc as he says he’s in his head a lot so some clarity here and there would be nice 😅 It would definitely make the songs and accompanying mv’s he/they put out even more important bc they are out out there in the big world for everyone’s eyes and ears to hear and see not only for H’s…

  5. Hey A.D. I wasn’t going to post a thing, I’m still on a break from Zarry. I won’t mind, is my personal intro into the whole crazy world of Zarry/ 1D/ Sam Smith’ La La La song. 1. I won’t mind brings me to tears, it is exquisite. Deliver, word choice, sentiment, and feelings. I agree, it’s has all the best elements of Zayn. The emotions in this song, make me teary eyed for this lost young man, that feels he will never get the love of his life. Sometimes I minimize the suffering Zayn has gone through. The never be mine chorus is hauntingly beautiful. When I listened to that one song, I knew he was singing about a love he lost and I searched for WHO he was singing about. 6 years down the damn rabbit hole, I still want them together. They are fucked right now( sorry for the language). We have talked in depth about this needed to occur. They were Toxic plain and simple. Zigi is gross and that needs to take its course too. Holivia is weird and I think was born in the Candace Owens diss to both of them and loneliness and anger. My hope is Zarry are friends and are trying to reestablish that, first. We know Harry wants to be a dad too. What I find interesting is the one area that Zarry bleeds together is in their music. Zayn did interviews, but he didn’t say a great deal about HIS music. He talked a lot more about his collaboration than NIL. Harry is doing other stuff, but not focusing on his music right now. These jerks are so time consuming and interesting 🤔.I want their love to burn brightly again, but not on the current terms, Thank you for revisiting IWM. P.S- I feel like some of your recent posts have been a personal test for me.😉😉😉 You know I’m gonna comment.❤️❤️🤣

  6. Amazing read as always. I never want it to end.
    Listening to IWM makes my heart feel how sweet their relationship was at times. Yes, they had many issues but when he says YOU KNOW I GOT YOU….I feel his love and caring for Harry. Their story is beautiful. Just wish they (zayn) could get it together. When I hear Z’s golden, IWM, and tightrope, I understand the Z that has Harry’s heart. Even during his interview with Zach, Zayn at one point giggles and says HOPEFULLY, HOPEFULLY (when they talk about a long road ❤️) I see the Zayn that he doesn’t show a lot. I miss it. I makes me sad to thk that after all this time of secretly pining for each other, that it wld go nowhere bc Z can’t act from his heart but instead does pap walks where he looks miserable and writes about Harry. I completely agree, there’s no good ending for Zayn choosing Zigi. He writes about mental struggles etc. A baby can’t change everything. I hope he finds strength and the little we heard with tightrope become more and we see a happier Z.
    Ultimately, I wld love/hope they end all this wanting to be together to actually being together. The world wld never have such a beautiful couple and story.

  7. Zayn has never written songs like this about anyone but Harry and I imagine he never will. He may write a song about his love for his daughter one day but I’m sure he will let the world know that it’s about her and not Gigi.
    I can feel his emotions come through in songs like this because they are pure and raw. It’s like you can feel how he is feeling if that makes any sense? Anyway thank you A.D. for your wonderful analysis and insight. As always so much work and detail and beautiful writing for us to enjoy! Thank you for all you do, truly. Be well xoxoxo

  8. Whenever Is see in IG or Twitter that you have post something in this wonderful website, I do a happy dancing… Even if sometimes I don’t agree with what you say I can’t say that whatever you write or research you do it perfectly… I’m still little sad that you won’t analyse the whole NIL album but I can understand why..

    What I would like to say about this article of yours – beyond the fact that is so damn analytical and I totally agree with what you say – is that the only thing that I disagree is that Z has made his choice.. With the covers that Z did back in October one day after H’s Golden video released, it seems to me like Z is still conflicted about what he wants and want he “has” to do for whatever reasons.. and if I remember correct back in October is when H recorded the Jingle Ball thing Harry seems to be sad or something… It’s a bloody roller-coaster with those two… i don’t have it in my heart to believe that they will ever truly end… but I want the best for both of them cause I love them both..

    By the way it’s very “funny” (and frustrating to me) that whenever Z is rumored to be somewhere (like 2 days ago where there was a photograph of Z in a shop somewhere and the Zarries begin to speculate that maybe Z is in London) or he is somewhere where he is photographed alone (like in 24.03), the very next day there is a pap walk…

    1. Speaking of Jingle Ball, am I the only one who noticed that Harry was wearing his matching Peace ring? He hasn’t worn it in ages, yet chose to wear it for that recording, but I haven’t seen him wear it since.

  9. Hi AD., pls continue to write about Zarry land.. we will always support you and follow every single stories , facts and details you’ll share with us.,, I’ believe you have the best written facts of all so keep on going.. I know harry and zayn will end up together,cause they love each other… and if GOD permits… ❤️💚💛🙏🙏🙏

    Stay safe and healthy, ..❤️❤️❤️

  10. this article is everything. Your narrative just makes it so much easier to see it so thanks a lot AD for all the time and effort you put into this <3
    Also, the part which I most agree with is that Zayn really does need to stop walking the tightrope and choose once and for all (hopefully choose what he says he would in tightrope) because and he's getting older and time's running out, and he can't just continue stringing H (and gigi) along
    + What do you think about holivia?

  11. After explaining the reason behind Tightrope, like accepting something about himself lately (just like what Harry said in “Lights Up”), do you think the magazine that was previously released with a “No Label” on it is a hint that he slowly coming out? I was just wondering coz no one’s talking about it.

  12. I’m curious. Has anyone seen a pic taken of Zayn on a pap walk with just his daughter? No Gigi or any other Hadid.

  13. Hello A. D.Thank you for keeping us informed about all details about H. and Z. I love them.
    Is a Roller coaster of emotions because we love them.
    I never read so much on my life before. 😂

  14. I’ve always interpreted “you’ll never be mine” as Zayn being convinced that him and Harry could never truly be, that he could never offer him that kind of relationship publicly. And H is responding that until Z is ready, he won’t give his heart away in the meantime.

    I think I will always have a bit of hope for zarry. It’s hard to imagine that a love like theirs would end this way. I just want them both to be happy, the way they were in those candid moments we got from them.

    1. Great interpretation. I think Zayn saying harry would never be his is like external forces or even family or religion stopping them from being together, not that either of them didn’t want to be together per say. So I agree with you.

    2. Exactly, especially the ‘I’m not allowed to talk about it’ line always made me wonder. For Z to write this song a year into his engagement to another while planning to leave the band he’s in after maybe a year or so, and to talk in it about not being allowed to talk about the relationship he sings about is… confusing? As always.

      What would be holding him back? Maybe he meant he himself is not allowing him to talk about it, maybe he meant external forces that wouldn’t be there anymore after leaving the band (which he and H were supposed to do together but Z) were holding him back (explaining why H held out hope in ‘someday maybe’; he wouldn’t do that if these external forces holding Z back would be there forever right? Buttt then we enter management theories and I’m very careful about those and we know why 🙄), or maybe he did mean his family/community and/or religion/way of life (spiritual) were holding him back (but he won’t ever break away from them or that (the integrated ideas about life and how it’s supposed to be) so H would know that about him and not hang on for so long I believe).

      I know I’m rambling but it does seem a song for H and H only, and I just don’t get why he would sing to H about not being allowed to talk about them, only for H to respond with saying that they (both) don’t talk about it bc that’s something they don’t do (talking about the IWM and MMITH subject: their relationship), making it seem like there are just more reasons than them not being ready to talk about it or be ‘open’ about it in whatever form, than ‘just’ either of them holding back. Even though at the time of MMITH H seemed to be referencing the communication problems while making a IWM ref so the not talking would be about not talking about what’s actually important (their relationship) compared to anything else, but in Z’s case…

      P.s. i’m not trying to find weird circumstances holding them or more specifically Z back, back then bc they had ample time since the band days to have left that behind and ‘talk about it’ but I’m just wondering what it was like back then in the mids of a pr engagement but also Zarry growing closer and closer till they broke apart

  15. Dear AD, by now, you are my only reliable source. I kinda wish he release “ I won’t mind” better and for everyone to hear about his love, but these days well… I can just wish them both the best in their own lives.

    Btw. Have you read that “The sun” article about 1D? It’s old and updated last year, but I just read it recently -_-. Talks about how much H was so sick of L bullshit (lol).

    1. Hey there, yes I did read that article a while ago and it offered an interesting perspective. I agree with most of that article because it aligned with how I viewed Harry and Louis’ relationship, as well as Harry’s relationship with the remainder of the band.

      1. Last summer, I watched some One Direction soundcheck videos because I thought it would show the band in a less guarded atmosphere and everyone seemed to get along until Zayn left, even soundchecks where Zayn wasn’t there that day, but he was still in the band.

        I watched a video of a soundcheck for Jimmy Kimmel 11/19/15 and was so upset by it, besides the screaming girls hurting my ears, I was also bothered by how the remaining three treated Harry, while Harry waved to fans and talked to every person behind the scenes. The other three barely interacted with anyone. There was a brief interaction between Niall and Harry at one point that seemed sweet. I rewatched the video this weekend on my tv instead of phone and it wasn’t just the three of them not talking to Harry, he wasn’t talking to them either, WTH could have happened? It is probably more difficult for Harry to not talk to someone than to talk to them. I’m an introvert and I was more friendly to strangers on a hospital elevator during the pandemic than Harry and the triplets were to each other.

        I’m including the video, there is lots of screaming and I think it might be a paparazzi video and it’s hard to watch people being mean to Harry, even if he isn’t talking to them, what did they do to get him to that point?

        https://youtu.be/1sAaahrjF94

        1. The hiatus was announced in August 2015. Given Harry is credited was pushing for the break – Louis in particular fought against it and was particularly bitter about it specifically blaming Harry “it was what Harry wanted”. So likely the internal relationships would have been quite strained by November 2015. If you look at videos from when Zayn was still there it was an obvious 2 + 3 dynamic i.e. Z/H + L/L/N. So when 2 became 1 it became a 1 + 3 dynamic. As AD has shown Harry behavior changed significantly after Z went. He was obviously still being there for his fans and I think performance wise. But otherwise he was quite withdrawn and was just biding his time to the end and honoring his contractual obligations for appearances and interviews. When you watched final US X Factor performance and the interview after, it feels like he’s just hanging on and almost seems frightened that something will happen to prevent the hiatus.

          1. @idkwhy that’s all so sad. I watched a couple fan videos of the Jimmy Kimmel show and Louis was a jerk to Harry, he would leave the stage so he didn’t have to stand next to him and Louis came back and Harry didn’t think he had his mic stand, so he handed him one and the crowd yelled “Larry” and Louis looked at Harry like he was about to hit him. I know Louis has had some sad things happen to him, but this was before that, no one likes a sulky millionaire.

            1. Thanks for sending article link. Yes some of things Louis said to Harry in publicly were awful, mean and absolute put downs. I feel there was a very strong element of Louis trying to have/keep control of Harry i.e. it was a form of coercion. Louis also seemed to actively mention “Larry” almost as in fostering “we have a special bond” with intent of staying connected to Harry. But then “Larry” took on a life of its own quite separated from the reality of the relationship. I don’t think anyone anticipated that happening and I don’t think either of them like what Larry became. But they had no way to pull it back and I think there are some benefits that come from it Louis wouldn’t want to lose i.e. it’s become his ongoing link to Harry. But I would believe Dan Wotton indicating something very negative went down between the 2 boys that was irreparable and then had to be managed in order to keep the band functioning. The dynamic of the Louis and Zayn relationship becomes very interesting in that regard.

              1. @idkwhy maybe being friends with Zayn was just a way for Louis to be around Harry. I get such a strong creep vibe from Louis. I’m coming in after the fact and I don’t get why he has fans who love his personality and singing, that’s his two worst things, I’m scratching my head. He continues to say mean things about Harry, really petty, snotty things, like Harry got a big record deal so he could hire the best songwriters and producers ( and that’s why he is successful) and when the article in “Rolling Stone” mentioned Harry using mushrooms, after the band ended, Louis had a gripe about Harry having a double standard. How do the Larries see that as love language? It seems like Louis and the Larry stuff are always going to be attached to Harry.

                1. When I watched the X factor with them I use to cringe watching Louis I never understood what the fuss was about him. even back then Harry and Zayn stood out from the other 3. Louis disrespects Harry regarding his mum and I found that uncomfortable. Zayn was the only one that wouldn’t do that. There is 1 time when I have seen Zayn react to Harry and its the one with the interview with the books and they are on a sofa Harry is sitting at the back Harry messes up saying something about new year and zayn repeats it but to himself with this smile like not taking the piss out off him but in a fond way! I’m not a Louis fan never have been tbh but Louis uses L🤢🤢🤢y to manipulate because he knows people buy into it…. and the thought of him and Harry NO nope not a chance lol

          2. @idkwhy I know AD has posted videos on her YouTube channel with Harry at awards shows after Z left looking pretty and sad.

            I wondered if anyone at the time noticed this or if just in retrospect. There’s an anti-Larry youtube channel and she posted secret blog communication three years ago, but the communications were from May 2015 and the big Larry blogs were banding together to get things out of the narrative, like the truth and they wanted to all be on the same page with not posting photos of Louis in bars kissing women and they also didn’t want to post any more photos of Harry looking sad and alone. That was in May 2015, Harry already was too sad and alone looking to have them post anymore photos of him.

            I was hesitant to share than Dan Woottan article because he makes Simon Cowell sound like a hero and 1 Direction sound like a herd of babies that article was from 2015 and updated 2020. I did send the link on another post though.

      1. You are welcome. You don’t have to post this, but if someone says thank you, I have to say you’re welcome.

  16. Your writing is superb. You take your time researching and gathering facts so that when you present your audience with your latest article it is fact-filled and meticulously written.

    1. Wow I really appreciate you reading and leaving such kind feedback. Thanks love. I try really hard to find as many facts as I can so that I’m not just rambling on haha thanks so much for recognizing that 🙂

    1. lol idk why people keep insisting there isn’t a baby in the stroller. That doesn’t prove anything one way or the other.

  17. Although I Believe Zarry are not in good terms I don’t believe their love is over yet.
    1.They are both in superficial relationships
    2. They are both in Hollywood the fakest industry in the world so they both have trust issues with people they get into relationships with, which is why they are so attached to each other.
    3. They are both very young 27/28 they are still finding out who they are Z is slower in doing that I believe they will end up together after all the people they mess around with.
    4. Even though Hollywood pretends to be woke they probably won’t support the relationship or will constantly find ways to sabotage it. I also believe Hollywood wouldn’t celebrate H dating a brown Asian Muslim man. If H were to come out dating a man they would prefer a white man.
    5. You never fall out of love with someone even when they die. They love each other too much idk what happened about the Grammys diss I wish I can go inside Z head but I can’t.
    6. I believe they will end up together when they’d older and mature even though we prefer it now because they are in their prime and their so hot(sigh) but so annoying their not over.
    7. Lizzios insta live gave me hope

    1. I hope maybe one day in the future they will overcome it all and end up together in a proper healthy relationship out of the spotlight

  18. Hi AD
    I just love your work. All of it , and this post is not an exception. I got into Zarry’s world through your YouTube channel and it was a one way road.!!! I have just started reading TTUM and it’s awesome. Tbh I refused to read it for a long time because I was sure it would be addictive. And I was right!!! It’s so beautifully written that you can’t stop reading it.
    I also want to thank you because during this pandemia your work has been an amazing company!!!
    I wish you the best !!! Keep on posting !!! Take care and stay safe ,dear.!!!

    1. Oh my gosh you’re so nice I can’t take it lol. Thank you so much for everything! Thanks for stopping by here and thanks for being so kind. And I appreciate you reading the book. That really means a lot to me that people take the time to do that so I promise to work extra hard to make the sequel worth your time. Thanks love! Take care 🙂

  19. ..”Or maybe it was fate? Because a love like this deserves to be known..” brilliantly, beautifully, and perfectly written words, that deserves to be the official slogan for Zarry. You amazes me every. Single. Time. You’re an icon ♥️

  20. My favourite post of yours. Got me deep in the feels with this one. Your narration and exquisite prose made this feel like an epic Ode to Zarry and their love.
    The simplicity of I Won’t Mind and Golden, Tightrope drives it in just how truly raw, wild, inhibited and beautiful… if tragic their love/hate story is.

    And you did it the utmost justice.
    Which is why you are and will remain the biggest, baddest bitch in this Zarryland.

    What is for you can only be for you.
    Thank you, A.🌸

    1. Thanks for all your kind words my dear. Also this is very beautifully said: “just how truly raw, wild, inhibited and beautiful… if tragic their love/hate story is.”

  21. Thank you for your thoughts, A.D. I agree with everything you have researched and written. But as today has yet again proven, Zayn is perpetuating the Zigi narrative. I can only surmise that what once was Zarry, is no longer.

  22. I have a feeling that the Hadids have something to do with this. Maybe he has been “told” to curb it, to cool it, to leave it, to STOP messing around and to show his allegiance to Gigi and the baby for once and for all. After all, WHY does he need to say the things he does? Why is it necessary to be sooo hurtful after so long?
    He says specific things to hurt. Personal digs aimed at Harry! Why? Not necessary! Gigi might not be the brightest button in the box, but maybe even SHE has worked it out… and is demanding he is in her “camp”?! I bet it was her that orchestrated that “marriage” thing with Ingrid… She is feeling extremely insecure about her role in his life and – no matter what becomes of Zayn & Harry together – after his remarks about them being to young to settle down etc. She (and the Hadids) was not happy and demanded his loyalty!

    1. I believe that after the whole baby thing happened, it was Harry that walked out, taking a stand for himself the first time in their relationship, walking away and cutting Z off. I think this took Z by surprise because no matter what used to happen, he always used to have H. Harry was always there, ready to risk it all but since he walked away I think Zayn has been feeling frustrated and angry, confused, lost. He’s making digs at Harry to get his attention and just release all the pent up frustration

      1. I absolutely agree. I also think that Z was used to make the decisions and H – sink or swim – had to deal with the consequences. For the first time now it seems that H took over and somehow cut him off. Unfortunately Z doesn‘t take this situation very well and shows off his negative features.

    2. Gosh ! This makes me so sad! Why does Zayn keep doing this to himself???… l feel so bad for Harry but l am thinking that he has people who do genuinely love him and will help him get through this …even if It means having to move on without Zayn or cutting Zayn off completely. .. l’m starting to think that Zayn might be a covert Narcissist

    3. The Hadids involvement in Zigi’s relationship always intrigued me too. Especially her parents, who are just weirdly heavily involved in her life – the life of a supermodel who should be an independent boss or queen as some like to call her, especially when her boyfriend and baby daddy is awol to his farm far away from her all the time 🙃. I think they’re just helping her push the narrative of either having it all with the fame, money, jobs, famous boyfriend and now a baby – while Z is absent mostly; or they are helping her push the narrative of her being the greatest mommy of all time while also being an independent boss working constantly, so that when the inevitable breakup comes around she will be the angel who always made the best of an unfair situation (to her and only her). I do think their involvement stops there and they’re just waiting for Zigi era 3.0 to end, while proving G to be the single mom queen.

      Current day Zigi to me seems to be convenient promo for some projects they both have and establishing a picture of great co parenting. I mean they don’t even try to hide that Gigi and the baby are in NY (hence daily pap walks) and Z is in PA most of the time. They’re just playing it out now and I think it’s been long coming. Idk when Z wrote the NIL songs in which he was on a crossroad of making a big change but given recent events I think he made a choice a while back and imo it’s not Zigi. We get happy Z when he’s out with fans, in the mv about new beginning 👀 and even when he’s out on the streets with his assistant and people, but not when Gigi is there. It’s almost like the concerned effort AD talks about post girl crush. It’s not him being cute with his privacy, it’s him actively distancing himself from her that he indeed looks like a hostage.

      It would be delusional from Gigi plus fam to want to demand loyalty from thát guy. On the contrary they seem more than fine with having Z as a ‘show daddy’ while raising Khai to be a real Hadid. After all, these people know how to play this game. I hope Z claims that baby and pulls her away to his private life when Zigi 3.0 is over bc Gigi’s definition of private is questionable to say the least…

    4. Wow my stupid head kept on rambling about Zigi that I forgot to react to the thing I started typing for 🤦🏾‍♀️ About the marriage confusion! I think it was an honest mistake on Ingrid’s side. She probably saw that silver band on Z’s ringfinger in the tba mv back then (since they haven’t met in person and the mv was filmed in one day or so, so when rewatching and it being zoomed in on so directly, it probably caught her eye) and that taken together with the Zigi narrative being pushed down your throat left and right, including a baby now, made her conclude accordingly imo.

    5. I feel like there is a limit to how much Z can pretend and tow the line. He’s said some honest things about he feels in the uncontrolled interviews that don’t mesh with the promoted scenario. Staged public appearances can’t really paper those words over.

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